Roommates

Roommates

Some of you will be sharing a room for the first time, and we know from experience that "roommate problems" are of major concern.  If you have been assigned to a double room with a roommate of your choice, we assume that roommate problems will be minimal.

It is important to communicate with your roommate upon arrival to Residence as well as throughout the year.  Your roommate needs to know your general personal background, your attitude and emotions, your values, and personal preferences.  If a problem arises at some point during the year discuss the issue right away rather than waiting.  Not saying anything the first time it happens will only make your roommate think it's okay and the behaviour will continue.  Open and honest communication usually ensures a satisfactory roommate relationship.  If you are living with a roommate you are required to fill out the Roommate Contract you will find in your room at the beginning of the year.

It is important to get to know your roommate upon arrival.  Some conversation starters could be:

• Where are you from?
• What is your family like?
• What are your favourite things to do?
• What is your major?  What led you to choose that?
• Why did you choose U of S?

It is also a good idea to set some common expectations.  A few things to discuss could be:

• Will you spend most of your time in the room?  Will it bother you if I do/don't?
• Are you looking for a friend or just a roommate?
  Study habits (Where/when do you plan to study?  What are your expectations if you are studying in the room?)
• When do you typically wake up/go to bed?
• Is it OK to have alcohol in our room?
• What are your expectations when it comes to cleaning?
• Is it OK to share items?  What is it OK to share?
• How do you feel about having guests (male or female) stay in the room?

These are just a few conversation starters to get the ball rolling so hopefully if an issue arises you have already talked about it.  It is important to keep an open line of communication with your roommate during your stay in Residence.

If you have been assigned a roommate by us, we appreciate that you may have to resolve some concerns and reach an understanding with the person who you will be sharing a room with for the next eight months.  There is only one way to do this effectively and that is by frank and open discussions about your lifestyles and habits.  Use the above suggestions to get started and go through the Roommate Contract at the beginning of the year to set some guidelines.  Where you have similar views about a particular item, a problem should not exist; where you have differing views, some compromise must be arrived at.  We suggest you go a bit more than half way.  THe key to all this is communication.  Be honest and open and respect the views of your roommate.

If conflict does arise, here are some tips about how to approach the situation:

• Talk about ideas and feelings as well as just things.
• Be honest about your feelings, likes, and dislikes.
• Be willing to compromise, but know which issues you will not compromise on and which ones you are willing to negotiate.
• Give your roommate the respect, consideration, and understanding you expect in return.
• Set aside the appropriate amount of time for a complete conversation (five minutes before class is not the time for a heart-to-heart).
• Discuss roommate problems with your roommate or Residence Life Staff only and not just anyone who happens to be walking by (you may regret it later).
• Values, feelings, and ideas change, and that's OK... don't feel betrayed if your roommate seems different after awhile. 

Roommate conflicts are not comfortable or easy, but with guidance and support, they provide rich opportunites to learn life skills.  We believe it is important to help students directly address roommate conflict and learn lessons presented by this interpersonal disagreement.  Residence Life Staff are trained and skilled problem solvers and conflict resolution experts.  Roommates are switched as a last resort, as conflict resolution and learning to live with others are life skills which are cultivated in a University Residence environment.

Room Changes

We believe that most roommate problems can be resolved by the two persons involved and, to that end, we do not wish to consider "room changes" before the end of September, unless an error has been made.

We encourage you to allow a one month period of adjustment.  During that time we suggest you go through the following steps to try and work things out:

• Talk to your roommate. It is always best when roommates first speak with each other directly and tactfully, before getting other people involved.  More often than not, roommate conflicts stem from a simple misunderstanding.  WHen a situation arises:
  • Go directly to your roommate.  Talk to them about your concerns.  Not telling your roommate about your concerns will not solve any issues that are occurring.
  • Do not engage in gossip.  Gossiping about your roommate or complaining to other hall members will just make the problem worse.
  • Address a problem immediately before it becomes a bigger issue.  This is the best way to maintain a positive relationship with your roommate.
• Talk to your RA or Advisor.  Depending on your issues and their severity, your RA or Advisor will suggest some reasonable and typical compromises that have often proven effective depending on the situation at hand.
• If, after a reasonable trial period, you and your roommate cannot resolve your differences, speak with the RLC or ARM.  They will be begin by asking you if you have discussed things with your roommate and have gone to your RA, so make sure you go through the above steps first.  If problems persist, a room change may be necessary.  There is a $25.00 fee for the first room change and a minimum charge of $50.00 for subsequent changes.

Room Consolidation

All students who are living in a double room and do not have a roommate will be required to move in with another student or have another student move in with them on Oct 1 (term 1) or Feb 1 (term 2) or at a later date at the discretion of Residence Life Staff.